Archive for the 'fun' Category

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Ten ways to make Church MORE eXciting

I felt another “Ten List” coming along, so here it is.

10 ways to make Church MORE eXciting

  1. Those programs you hand out, they’re now called “Boooya-tins”
  2. The “Call To Worship” prayer begins with an announcer exclaiming “Let’s get ready to HUUUUMMMMBLE”
  3. All services now referred to as “Extravaganzas”
  4. More cowbell
  5. Radio advertisements emphasize “SUNDAY!!! SUNDAY!!! SUNDAY!!!”
  6. More doctrinal cage matches
  7. Two words: “Haptic Pews”
  8. Super Sized Sacraments
  9. No cantatas, singspirations, musicals, or simple programs, just Rock Operas.
  10. Start your own reality show “Extreme Makeover: Soul Edition”

Some CompUSA Fun

Last Wednesday I stopped into CompUSA.com just to see what is going on. I was hoping they would have a list of stores bought out by Systemax (aka. Tigerdirect) and the local CompUSA would be on the list. Instead, I saw that someone on the CompUSA web team had been having some fun. This image contains some of what I saw:

Some Modified Monitors at CompUSA.com

If you would like to see the full context I printed the page to PDF: CompUSA.com’s Modified Monitors. Do note that I created the image above using their monitor images. The logo is from their site, but the “MONITOR MANIA” was added by me (Futura Extra Bold Oblique).

I would love to know the story behind this. It’s just great that they got their faces into the site at the last minute.

I am leaving the following search bait for others searching on this topic:
ViewSonic VA2026w 20-inch LCD Monitor, Black/Silver
AL2216Wbd 22-inch LCD Monitor, Black
H190L 19-inch LCD Monitor, Silver/Black – Product Number: 342045 – Brand: Envision

The Breakup

A great video about advertisers and consumers.

I can picture a video similar to this only with churches in the advertiser spot and people in general in the consumers spot.

Church: “But we had that clever pop culture referencing sermon series last month. Oh, and don’t forget that ironic and irreverent postcard we sent.”

Prospect: “But I came to church to learn from the Bible.”

My Christmas Greetings for You

YouTube has a nifty feature for sending videos as greetings. Here is my greeting to you, personally.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

Chair Roller

I have a lovely linoleum tile floor in my office which I just had to have waxed again due to the amount of damage my chair has done to it over the last 28 month. It has been recommended that I get a chair mat, so I am looking for something cheap (that’s just the kind of guy I am).

For $48.99 I can get the “Office Depot® Brand Hardwood Floor Chair Mat, Rectangular, 46″ x 60″, Clear” which features the following:

  • Antiskid backing keeps your mat from slipping.
  • Lets you roll your chair easily without harming your hardwood floors.
  • Helps to reduce repetitive strain injury and lower back fatigue caused by rolling your chair manually.
  • Made of durable clear vinyl to hold up to constant use.
  • Backed by manufacturer’s 3-year warranty.

Wait! “Helps to reduce repetitive strain injury and lower back fatigue caused by rolling your chair manually.” You mean this thing can move my chair for me? Sure, linoleum is nice and smooth, but it doesn’t automatically determine where I need my chair and then move it automatically. And for less than $50!

Wi-Fi T-Shirt

wifi_shirt_anim.gif

I believe this could be a part of my new tool set. This shirt lights up more bars as the 802.11b/g signals around you get stronger. This is like adding another sense. Currently available from ThinkGeek.com

This is similar to the T-Qualizer or the T-Clock, but just a little geekier.

Spam for a Long Winter’s Night

On Monday, Spamhaus added us to their blacklist. The cause was spam backscatter from our Barracuda. According to the report, they had 3 “we blocked your spam” replies from addresses within our system. We had to drop the blocking reports to senders, this will not be a popular option once people no longer know why ministers have not received their emails.

So, while we work on fine tuning the spamwall a bit more I thought I would share some of the poetry I found in quarantine.

Down the long course of the gray slush of things
demonstrating their talent for comedy stroke
To have been claimed by what we see of what
Nor, indeed, the bit of paint itself can know of.
To a higher level of appearance.
Beneath a pile of corpses, lying massed
Still has to be intoned, as in a lonely
A matter of getting all that right . . .
Oh, I know. The snow. The effective snow
The pain of being born into matter.
Chose to walk out of it, they’d have to pass
Dim, and die tonight?
VII. Hudson and His Strait; Baffin and His Bay
Or else, like us, sunk into some long gaze
Not so much of place as of renewed hope,
And still my mind goes groping in the mud to bring
“Now it’s my turn to sing!”
Sought to contrive, intending to express
In Florida, it’s strawberry season

After reading that, my first thought was “The National Endowment for the Arts must be supporting spam artists too.” It might be a program set up to expose system administrators to poetry.

Most of the lines appear on a page entitled: “Poems for a Long Winter’s Night” with the only exception being the line about Hudson and Baffin. This page appears to be very popular with a very prodigious spammer.

Yeah, Well Hitler used I-Mag

The Modern Mechanix blog has a post about a German invention from 1937 that allowed everyone to see the speaker. The hair doesn’t look right, but the mustache almost does. I think that is supposed to be Adolf Hitler up there.

The system scans the speaker with a green light and then uses that to produce an image through a cathode ray tube which goes through a lens and onto a large screen.

So, if you ever have a need of an argument against using I-Mag in some situation (too small of a venue, improper equipment, ugly preacher, etc.) just pull out the argument “Hitler used I-Mag, are we going to start book burning and pogroms as well?”

Earth and Sky

I have been playing with and enjoying Google Earth’s Sky option (although I have had some odd configuration errors), but I have also been looking at some interesting adaptations of Google Maps.

The Earth At Night & Cloud Cover

Just click the links. Seeing it will do more than explaining, plus I am tired and lazy tonight.

In a related note, the Internet Archive has made a deal to host an archive of NASA images at Nasaimages.org. Right now it is just a NetSol holding page which doesn’t show up in the Internet Archive even though it was registered in 2005. Additionally, the email address of the Internet Archive is apparently internetarchive@yahoo.com.

Duggar Family Fun

All it takes to get your family featured on the Discovery Health web site (including fun facts and games about your family) is having 17 children.

I don’t believe we are going to be able to catch up, so I’ll let them keep their position.

As one of my Bible College professors once said, “If we can’t convert them we can at least out breed them. Thankfully I am married to a goddess of fertility.”  They had 5 kids at that time.